Is There Life after the Death of a Loved One?

Part of living life is losing loved ones, especially as we get older. Sometimes cancer, a heart attack, a car accident, or suicide may seem to steal a loved one from us prematurely. Death of someone close is a very stressful experience, and after taking care of the immediate business, the magnitude of the loss often crashes in. What do you do then? Here are some tips on how to work through the grief and live a happy, productive life again.

1. Give yourself the gift of time so you can adjust.
   Grieving is a journey. Even though it does not feel like it, this journey is a testament to your inner strength and courage.
2. Express your feelings.
   Cry, scream, punch a pillow. It is normal to feel terrible and healthy to acknowledge this feeling. Holding this in is the worst thing you can do!
3. Emptiness and numbness are normal.
   Recognize these feelings – acknowledge them. These feelings are perfectly appropriate for what you have been through.
4. Be still.
   Sit or lie down, relax, and grieve. Making yourself busy to avoid the hurt only prolongs your grief.
5. Avoid making major decisions.
   Once through this period of bereavement, you will regain your ability to function normally, but during intense grief your mind is confused.
6. The path of your journey through grief is littered with potholes.
   Some days will be easy. You think you are through the worst, and then something will trigger overwhelming grief again. Each time you overcome these stumbling blocks, your heart will heal a little more as you find inner peace.
7. Steady as you go.
   Grief work is emotional reorganization.  You are still alive. Life is still a pleasure. Release feelings of guilt. Life is a gift – a gift that your loved one would want you to embrace.

Even though the physical presence of your loved one is gone, the relationship with them still exists. Your journey through grief will increasingly liberate you from the agony of loss. This journey helps you to complete your emotional relationship with your loved one and allows you to refocus your life’s energies toward the future. So value your feelings, and be kind to yourself. This is, after all, about love. Loving the one who is gone and saying goodbye with peace in your heart.

Laura King, CHt, NLP, Life Coach has offices in Palm Beach Gardens and Lake Worth. 561.841.7603